How to stay yourself all the time?

Self-help guide

Adam Wise
2 min readJan 26, 2022
Image: Denise Jones

My journey of finding myself have been long. I have worked in dozen of places and changed 3 cities. Now, at the age of 26, when I finally accepted myself as who I am and understood that I am a writer, my goal is to stay true to myself. Interaction with others can sometimes change your priorities. It is hard to stay steadfast when you see how others succeed in their work or relationships. You inadvertently start doubting your goals and position.

Today I tried to make a guide for myself and for everyone who needs one. Here are my rules of staying yourself wherever you are.

  1. Always eat and drink what you want. For example, if everyone is having beer, but you want wine and really don’t like beer — don’t drink it just because there is no wine. There is always a choice, you may not drink at all. The choice is yours.
  2. Wear comfortable clothes. Our outfit affects on how we feel. Did you ever noticed that too expensive or bright clothes makes you feel uncomfortable? Try to choose a wear depending on how you want to feel. For example everyday I wear sweater and jeans because I want to feel myself loose but collected.
  3. Speak only about the things you want to speak. I am sure that each of us felt at least once regret of talking shit. At the time, we just try to be nice and keep up the conversation. But the next day we cannot understand why we told what we told. This happens when we are influenced by others and forget our values.
  4. Don’t try hard on building relationships. Relationship cannot be held by one person, it needs effort of both partners. It also applies to friendships. Don’t hold on people that don’t accept you as who you are. There are thousand of opportunities to build real relationships with other people, with people who also understand themselves and let others be true.

Don’t change your habits because its uncomfortable for people around you. If it’s hard to follow the rules above, may be it is time to change your croud. Only you know what is right. Don’t let others rule your life.