How to stop living someone’s life?

Here I tried to explain, why we can make right decisions, yet still be wrong

Adam Wise
2 min readDec 26, 2021

Steven Jobs once said: Your time is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s life. At the time I heard it, I couldn’t really understand what did he mean. Living someone else’s life? Is it even possible? - I asked myself. Recently I realised: when we make decisions based on someone’s reason, someone’s “wisdom” — we are living their lives. It doesn’t matter who this person is: your parent, grandparent, friend, boss, celebrity, billionaire, greek philosopher or Dostoevsky.

The real knowledge is your knowledge. We all want to make right decisions, but the truth is the only right decision is your decision. Making own decisions based on our knowledge can teach us a lot. Moreover, we will never have regrets because we act based on what we think is right and truely want for ourselves. We must use knowledge and wisdom of others to understand ourselves, not the world. I don’t feel the life the way you do. How can I know what is good for you? How anyone can know it?

Himalaya mountains shoot by Raimond Klavins

Social isolation has reminded me my true values. The quiteness taught me to listen to myself. All the information which is spread by media became useless to me. I do not want to be a product of the media, I want to become the product of myself.

I think we should stop fearing to make wrong decisions or lose approval of others. To be honest, recently I lost my two best friends as I started living my own life. I realised that all these years I’ve wasting my time by seeking their approval. But I don’t regret of anything. Now, I understand myself better and know what I truely want. The relationships that I am building now are stronger than ever because its real me. Now, when I need to make a decision, I don’t ask myself “what is right thing to do?”, but “what I think is right to do?”

P.S. Hope I could deliver my message.

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